It is bloody cold...

     Well that is just bloody typical is it not?, I spend months, nay years moaning to clients, neighbors, Bramble in fact to anyone is foolish enough to get within hearing range of my perpetual whining, about how we are losing our seasons and that the effects upon gardening and indeed upon nature are becoming more and more serious. Then we get bloody snow....in Winter for Odin's sake! Not only do we have that one type of weather that really does stop my gardening business in its tracks, tonight's forecast is for minus (yes bloody minus) seven degrees Celsius, with more of the same until at least the weekend. Hellfire its just not bloody well right, not right at all. To tell truth I do welcome this cold snap and the return of a season to something like it should be, but there is the timing of it….just after Yule, when my finances resemble those of a church mouse that has just been robbed of all his cheese by a scrawny band of weasels and now has the curds and whey tax collector banging at his little arched doorway demanding his due! I know that the Northern gods are a cruel bunch of buggers at the best of times with little care for rotund gardeners, but it would have been nice to have a least a month of earning before they decided to bring back Winter, makes you wonder if the sods care at all.

    Faced with another day of trying to avoid working in my bitterly cold, un-heated, un-insulated and very drafty workshop, I despaired at my ill fortune. Another problem this brings is that I am trying to eat differently and also increase my physical activity in order to shed the odd pound (re stone) or two, and moping in the house does not aid either. So, rather grudgingly I trudged up the path to my workshop's entrance (my grand estate, ahem, lies betwixt two roads, with the driveway opening onto the smaller, never to be cleared by the council one) to observe that once again community spirit within the village has albeit died a grim death. The  majority of the residents along this road have managed to use just enough salt from the council’s “do it your bloody self” provided yellow receptacles to enable the release of just their own vehicle from the snows icy grip. Those who are not physically able to clear their own drives and the road adjacent are left to fend for themselves. With a shrug of my shoulders I pulled my wheelbarrow and shovel from the van and began my "every time it bloody snows routine" of  clearing and salting the areas along to road that have been left to the gods (have I mentioned about the Northern gods lack of care lately?) to hopefully make access easier for all. To be honest my next-door neighbor 'Baldey Man' is usually beside me at these times but he has only gone and damaged his back, there will be no sympathy from me I can tell you. Another neighbour , whom I hold in quiet disdain (long ish story) did actually come out after a while and offer to help but to be honest he was about as effective as a pair of breasts upon a mackerel. But all was not lost as at least I got a physical workout (very physical) and it kept me from snacking upon all that tastes soooo good, but then conspires to fatten me up ready to be a pagan sacrifice.

    After this I dragged myself back to the house for a protein biased meal (that does seem to fill me and lasts longer before my belly begins its hungry lies) and the obligatory cup of tea. Feeling sated I returned to the workshop and braved a couple of bitterly cold hours before having to pick up G from work. G is from that foreign land down south, Londinium I believe the soothsayers call it, and in her years of driving has not really encountered the white stuff and lacks a little confidence when it drops. Therefore tis my duty, nay honor to ferry her back and forth to work at these times (do not get me started on t'other drivers at this point). I did not achieve a great deal in this time, just more tiding, finding the majority of missing mower parts and I have stripped down the rear roller of said mower to try and find a reason for a drive bracket failing (the original reason that it turned up in the Orc's Workshop nay on two years ago).

    Unfortunately no fault with the internals of the roller could I discern, but at least it will be cleaned, degreased and put back together on my next venture into the freezer. And that is about it for this ramble, tis time to make myself a hot toddy for my sore throat (honestly?) and then head to the land of nod, I wonder if I shall dream tonight, probably of frostbite if I do. 

    'till the next time take care and be kind folk,

John

End of year….

    Well that's just about the end of another year and I cannot say that I am sorry to see the backside of it. It just seems to have been one of those periods of time when if it can go wrong it bloody well will do so (as have the years before it), whole heartedly arse and good riddance to it is what I say. Because I have only recently started to scribe once more on these hallowed pages the events of the last few years are not 'out there' and I don't think that I shall be trawling them up from the depths of time to recount them with you for the past is now done, the future lies ahead and the now is the important part m'thinks. If I do manage to continue scribing here I may well recount to you some of the events of the past for context to some of my tales, but we shall see.

    Tis a funny time of year this be, I am always very low at Christmas yet the few days betwixt Yule and the waxing of the New Year fill me with some hope that life will become easier but at the same time I still hear the Black Dog just whispering in my minds ear that it will never be plain sailing. Within these in-between days I have managed a couple of days of work, much to the protests of my back and knees and I am thinking that there is going to be plenty more of the same with the forecast of more stormy weather coming our way. Perhaps the northern gods have sent the storms as a reward for me not giving up as yet, or perhaps it is just global warming? Whichever it is I am grateful for the chance to earn some coppers for my purse, and I am thinking that Odin is perhaps keeping an eye out for me (well he is not likely to keep two out is he!)

    But there is indeed a decided difference to my mindset as I look to the coming year that is hard for me to put into words. But perhaps it is suffice to say that I feel within my not so youthful body, a yearning to make it better, happier and more piratey, gar. After all the Northern gods do not look fondly upon those who just lie down on life's road without a bloody good fight do they. 

    Oh and just a quick update on the Orc's Workshop, as well as some more tidying in the between days I have repaired and sold this heavy duty strimmer...

    And already have my next project on the bench, although this one is no quick fix as a total refurbishment and rebuilt is required and coupled with the fact that it was stripped to its present state at least two years ago so finding the parts and fitting them back into the puzzle should be fun, not....

    So finally it is just left for me to wish you all a New Year that smiles upon you and yours and grants you peace, health, happiness and the chance for a little piracy.

    Hopefully I will see you in the year ahead for more tall tales and unwarranted ramblings..

John